The Broom (adult-content fable)

all fairy tales went wrong in the neverlanding district
cinderella ate cheap toffees
lost one tooth and bit the broomstick
that was clean and white and thin like a fountain pen
but her mouth was not an inkwell
it was exactly the way crying children bite their thumb
or the way patients on drugs bite the bed sheets
to stop their tongue from trembling

although she felt nothing because of the dental anaesthesia
and her tongue touched only that empty place left by her tooth
the church cleaning women said
that she made oral sex with that broom
thus she was a sinner even though she carefully verified
if the broom had gold rings or wedding rings
tying up the bunch of twigs
and it had none
moreover it had a new official label covering the old one

others said that cinderella was the guilty one
not that damn anaesthesia
because she could not guess that the broom was still sensitive
at its other end still green
and she had been too industrious polishing the mirrors
for her stepsisters who believed themselves to be very beautiful
— the broom knew all these

afterwards cinderella’s feet grew up two more sizes
and no prince ever made her try a crystal shoe

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